» Listings for 2014

1. Dental phobia treated by The Speakmans in Episode 7

   Posted on 4:02pm Tuesday 22nd Jul 2014

   Dental phobia is increasingly common and something that I see on a regular basis. In fact I even run practice days at my dentist's surgery twice a month to help people who are worried about a dental appointment. This fear can also include a fear of needles.

   In this episode of The Speakmans on ITV we met Ashley who has a fear of dentists. Her dental phobia started when she had problems as a child with her teeth. Now aged 28 Ashley has not been to the dentist since she was 16 years old. She would rather suffer toothache and has lost five teeth since she last visited a dentist because of her dental phobia.
   

   Now her phobia means that she is more withdrawn and she is now having problems with her front teeth which means that she will not smile. Her boyfriend is also concerned because she has lost a lot of weight as she will not eat proper meals. She has gone from a size 10 to a size 6. She only eats cereal with the front of her mouth. She also has a baby called Peyton and she wants her to see a good example. She would like to get married but cannot do this because she is scared of being able to smile in her wedding pictures.

   Interestlingly this seemed like something that the Speakmans could deal with without having a group family session, but as per every other episode they did in fact see Ashley and her boyfriend together. This is something that happens with every person the Speakmans see and is all to predictable. You do not need to have a family, in order to get help. I think the message this is sending may concern those who are alone or do not have support. That is simply not the case and is just a sad reflection on a prorgamme that is relying too heavily on its format to the detriment of helping people who are watching. When the Speakmans said that unless she spoke to her boyfirend about the situation they could not help her, do understand that this is for television and they could equally help her without her having to cry in front of her boyfriend, but this clearly doesnt make such entertaining television.

   Sharing your worries is of course a good thing to do, but if you have no one to share them with and feel alone then sharing them with your therapist really will help.

   The overly dramatic music adds to the tension but it is a shame that we do not see more of the actions that the Speakmans take in their private therapy sessions.

   Once her sister was brought into the room I started to feel even more unhappy with the way that therapy is being portrayed as something that you can only do in a group. I know that the Speakmans have been asked about this via social media and I have also received enquiries following their TV shows asking the same. For the record myself and most therapists see clients as individuals and not in a group setting.

   It is also interesting to see that they exposed her to dental instruments in order to treat her. This desensitisation method is quite old fashioned. Although, again this may just be a device to create interesting television. I know that when I work with clients at the dental practice I would never expose them to something unless they felt ready and asked me to.

   Sadly we miss much of the actual therapy that takes place so we do not really know what techniques that Nik and Eva Speakman use to treat Dental Phobia. The fear of dentists can be dealt with in a variety of ways, depending on the issue and client. I use a mixture of talking, hypnotherapy, EFT and NLP to help you to lose your dental phobia and move forward with your life. We saw the Speakmans show Ashley a picture of her face with the teeth blacked out. I sometimes think that the TV show art department need to create a lot of props that may not normally be used.

   Of course the important thing is that we are seeing that you can overcome a phobia. If you want to keep a phobia and let if cause you worries and problems you could do that, or you could seek help and let that phobia go. Which would you prefer?

   If you are looking for help with a dental phobia then you can contact me on [email protected] or call me on 07980 233160. As well as working from my Hypnotherapy practice room in Redditch and my Dental Surgery in Stratford on Avon I offer sessions via Skype.

   You can read more about my work at the Dental Practice and Dental Hypnotherapy here..  Dental Hypnotherapy for fear of dentists.

   Never be afraid to ask for help. Asking is often the hardest part.

2. How to Treat Agoraphobia and what if your family are not around you? The Speakmans Episode 6

   Posted on 2:31pm Monday 21st Jul 2014

   The Speakmans Episode 6 - How to Treat Agoraphobia and what if your family are not around you?

   Episode 6 of the ITV show The Speakmans dealt with agoraphobia. The fear that stops many people from being able to leave their homes is becoming more and more common and so seeing them work with a sufferer is a wonderful idea for a show. The latest gossip is that The Speakmans are looking to appear on the next series of I’m a celebrity get me out of here, but for now it is business as usual for Nik and Eva.

   Nineteen year old Georgia feels trapped in her own home because she is agoraphobic. Her mother and family are concerned that she has never been able to work let alone enjoy a life outside of the home. After a series of panic attacks she has not left her home for four years. Often panic attacks really can take over your life. I work with clients who think that they have to continue having panic attacks because they control you. Being able to show them how to take back that control and end the panic  attacks is one of the most rewarding aspects of being a Clinical Hypnotherapist.
   

   Georgia finds that her own sister is unable to have a normal relationship because she does not even want to be around her.  Her younger brother Robbie also finds seeing her worry difficult. She explained that when she has panic attacks she feels she is going to die. This is common with sufferers of panic attacks. What you can learn and perhaps already know is that panic attacks always go away. They never last, so once you take back control then you can lose them. The reason that I created a free MP3 on “How to Stop a Panic Attack” was to help people to understand this very thing.

   The family meeting

   Georgia cannot even visit her nephews. They of course have to learn to understand about her problems and they will be picking up on her worries. We can only hope that they do not inherit the same concerns. After watching several minutes of her concerns it does seem that she really is suffering. I certainly would not want to imply that this television show would pick people who they had not researched, however a quick check on twitter the other day showed that a previous participant who had been unable to leave the house had in fact been on a holiday abroad a few weeks before filming and clearly enjoyed it. I wonder if any tabloids are looking at that. It would be a shame if a few foolish comments on social network undid the good created by talking about and making people aware of how you can change.

   The Speakmans visited her at home to have their normal family group session. Rest assured that if you do not have a supportive family around you help is still available.

   According to Georgia and her mother the first incident that happened was when her father came home after being attacked. They asked why he was not there and they said that he was not comfortable around cameras. I am not sure that everyone is comfortable having a group therapy session with a TV crew around. Of course this does not mean that the issue could not have been dealt with sooner by the family. This incident happened 14 years ago. When her father was attacked she was told to stay in her bedroom so that she did not see. Now she spends more time in her bedroom than anywhere as it seems safe to her.

   Her sister Alex then joined the sofa and explained that her son had not been christened because Georgia could not attend. She explained that her six year old would say he can leave the house so why can his aunty not do so.

   As we see every episode the family wrote letters to each other. Again, I have to stress that if you don’t have the support of your family, or they are not around it does not mean that you cannot get help. It has no relevance. I have seen a number of people enquire since the Speakmans began about the fact they do not have a family to sit with and talk through. The vast majority of my clients and those of other therapists are also seen alone. It is fine to work that way and much more common.

   After the therapy that took place alone with Georgia the Speakmans were able to help her to see things in a new way. By talking though the reality about panic attacks, and other therapy that we did not see Georgia was able to overcome her fears in the same way that I see clients do week after week.

   We were then able to see her leave her home and start to see how she could get her life back on track.

   Something to bear in mind is that this programme was not filmed in an afternoon. Georgia herself has been on social media and mentioned at least four days during which she was filmed. This isn't in keeping with the format of the tv programme but the reality is that if you have a fear or phobia and have had it for years it will take longer than an afternoon to let go of it. That is a good thing. Never be in a hurry because these things will take as long as you need them to. You will overcome your fear when you are ready.

   How can I get help for Agoraphobia?

   If you are suffering from panic attacks, agoraphobia or any other stress and anxiety then please do think about asking for help. Speak to two or three therapists and find the one who you think will be the best fit for you. You really can feel better. If you would like to try my “How to Stop a Panic Attack” MP3 it is available on the Shop link at the top of this page. It’s free and I do hope that it will help to put things into perspective for you and show you a way forward.

   If you would like to ask about working with me as your Clinical Hypnotherapist you can email me on [email protected] or call me on 07980 233160 without obligation.